Forum of Dogs: How to Sit on the Lap of Your Boss

HI MY NAME IS OLAF I AM A DOG I WANT TO SIT ON THE LAP OF MY BOSS HOW DO I DO THAT

HI MY NAME IS STEWART I AM A DOG I AM A GOOD DOG I SIT ON THE LAP OF MY BOSS ALL THE TIME I DO NOT SIT ANYWHERE ELSE I GUESS WHERE DO YOU SIT I CANNOT IMAGINE SITTING ANYWHERE ELSE BUT THEN THE BOSS SAYS I DO NOT HAVE A GOOD IMAGINATION I DO NOT KNOW WHAT AN IMAGINATION IS OH WELL ANYWAY

HELLO I AM HENRY I AM A DOG I AM THE BEST DOG HERE IS WHAT I DO AND I DO NOT KNOW WHY YOU WOULD NOT DO THIS WHEN THE BOSS TELLS ME TO LIE DOWN I LIE ON THE FLOOR BY THE BOX WITH PICTURES ON IT WHEN SHE LOOKS AWAY I SNEAK ONTO THE COUCH SHE LOOKS UP AFTER A WHILE AND I GET A LONG TALK ABOUT HOW BAD I AM BUT SHE DOES NOT MAKE ME MOVE SO WHATEVER ANYWAY AFTER A WHILE MORE I SNEAK UP TO WHERE I AM ALMOST TOUCHING HER AND I GET ANOTHER LONG TALK BUT SHE STILL DOES NOT MAKE ME MOVE SO NEXT TIME SHE LOOKS UP I AM IN HER LAP AND VERY COMFORTABLE THAT IS HOW IT IS DONE

HI MY NAME IS STEWART I AM A DOG I AM A GOOD DOG OH DEAR

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HI MY NAME IS OLAF I AM A DOG THAT IS NOT WORKING I TRIED IT LIKE YOU SAID BUT WHEN I GOT ON THE COUCH THERE WAS NO PLACE FOR THE BOSS TO SIT SO THERE IS NO LAP FOR ME WHAT DO I DO

HI MY NAME IS STEWART I AM A DOG I AM A GOOD DOG OH DEAR THAT DOES NOT SOUND GOOD YOU SAY THERE IS NO PLACE FOR YOUR BOSS TO SIT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

HI MY NAME IS OLAF I AM A DOG I MEAN THERE IS NO PLACE FOR MY BOSS TO SIT SHE TRIES TO SIT ON MY HEAD AND I HAVE TO GET DOWN

HI MY NAME IS STEWART I AM A DOG I AM A GOOD DOG HOW BIG IS YOUR COUCH

HI MY NAME IS OLAF I AM A DOG IT IS BIG LIKE WE HAVE A TABLE WHERE THE BIG PEOPLE EAT AND THE COUCH IS BIGGER THAN THE TABLE I DO NOT KNOW WHY THE BIG PEOPLE EAT THERE AND DO NOT SHARE I LOOK RIGHT DOWN ON THEIR BOWLS AND THEY GET MAD WHEN I TAKE A CHICKEN LEG OUT OF ONE EVEN IF IT IS A BIG PERSON WHO IS SMALLER THAN ME OH WELL

HI MY NAME IS STEWART I AM A DOG I AM A GOOD DOG OH DEAR IF MY BOSS TRIED TO SIT ON ME SHE WOULD SMOOSH ME ACTUALLY SHE HAS SMOOSHED ME BUT SHE WAS REALLY SORRY I DO NOT KNOW WHAT THE BIG PEOPLE EAT THEY WILL NOT GIVE ME ANY EVEN IF I WHINE OH WELL YOU ARE LUCKY YOU CAN SEE IT I CANNOT SEE IT EVEN IF I STAND ON MY BACK LEGS I AM TOO SHORT YOU ARE A REALLY BIG DOG IT SOUNDS LIKE SO I WOULD NOT TRY TO SIT ON THE LAP OF YOUR BOSS

HELLO I AM HENRY I AM A DOG I AM THE BEST DOG WHO CARES IF YOU ARE A BIG DOG SIT WHERE YOU WANT EXCEPT IF I AM AT THE HOUSE WHERE YOU LIVE I AM SITTING ON THE COUCH SO ANYWAY